Ok, you know how I said living on a higher plane meant there were no limits anymore? The above picture is just the perfect example of the quick karmic turnaround that happens when I get it…a bit wrong. I know I want to embrace the passion I had as a youth for just going for it…and I still do, with this qualification: it doesn’t mean I can throw common sense to the wind. I love movement and working out, and yesterday I amped it up and while I won’t go into details…it appears that my body, specifically my right knee wasn’t too happy about it…especially my knee cap which stopped tracking correctly and boom, is now swollen and sore(thankfully, no permanent damage). It appears, that with Love there is no risk…there is risk when it comes to understanding the frailty of our human structure. I’m embarrassed, I should know better, especially when it comes to handling the accumulation of damage I’ve done to my body over the years, while still embracing a healthy regimen of exercise. I have been schooled, and now forced to sit still, apply cold laser, and ARP (a tens unit on steroids). At least my art will keep me occupied. Pray for me.
I love Michelle Obama…she inspires me, and I really needed the inspiration this week, so I decided to paint her portrait…there is much still to be done…but I am excited about the progress so far.
After a rough couple of days falling prey to particularly painful and familiar emotional triggers, I literally bolted up in the night and suddenly said out loud, “this will not do”. I cannot live my life on a higher plane tripping over the same responses I have to situations that appear hard, hurtful, beyond my power and control, or deceptive. None of what I’m doing on this journey matters if the emotions ruling the moment are rooted entirely in someone else’s choices and behavior. In this instance, I acknowledged the limitations of my perspective and focused only on my choices, my behavior, my truth and then responded accordingly. I am no longer in the boat where fear and typical colloquial human behaviors rule, because I stepped out onto the water awhile ago, and the rules of survival here require that I let go of the old risk assessments that ruled my life and I must put into practice all that I’ve learned up until this point. It suddenly became clear to me, that if living on a higher plane is to be a real way of life and not just a hopeful pipe dream or philosophical fodder, I have to embrace the necessary spiritual proprioception that allows me to move smoothly into the future. I have to practice the belief’s I hold, whole heartedly, which means acknowledging the risks I’ve been fearful of simply don’t exist anymore. There. Is. No. Risk. Anymore. None of what I do from this point forward matters if I’m not all in with respect to the promises extended to me by the God of Love. Loving unequivocally means embracing that power fully and allowing it to be the force that drives my life forward and that another’s fear won’t sway me away from the love I already know is in my heart. I’ve worked too long and hard over these past years evolving this blueprint of mine, not to trust the journey at this point, and while I also may not understand all the who, what and why’s of everything that have happened thus far, the result is that I do love and wield love with so much more color, passion, and hope than ever before, and I certainly don’t want that to stop. While expressions change, the power of Love does not.
For a long time I have become so cautious that I can’t help but trip over myself over and over…which, if we are all being truthful, is a common experience that most of us learn to do after a lifetime of accumulating bumps and bruises. Following Jesus command to step out onto the water with him has brought me back to my childhood and youth where throwing caution to the wind was the natural way go to. While I still respect limitations, (age and wisdom will do that) I am also choosing to believe that if I let Love guide me, move me and light up this path I’m on, I will have all the protection I need, whatever challenges are presented. I also pray every day for those whom I love and send love to that they know they will be protected too…and because life on the water is glorious.
